For many years there’s been a general trend towards minimalist design in Britain. From architecture, street furniture to clothing, function seems to be more important that diversity. The idea behind minimalism is to get rid of material things we don’t need, and to simplify design. Hopefully with the result of allowing space for what matters most.
Minimalist architecture and street furniture (bins, benches, railings etc) have straight lines, and no unnecessary detail. You can see this type of design in the i360 on Brighton beach, which contrasts with the more ornate older structures. Minimalism in clothes means simple muted colours, particularly for men. This shows up in our ideas of professional dress-code as well. The world of counselling is not immune either. Imagine a typical counselling room. You probably see a room with neutral colours, simple furniture, a bookshelf, perhaps like something from an Ikea catalogue. As a counsellor I’m interested in how these minimalist designs reflect or affect our spirits and minds.
Benefits of minimalism
There’s nothing like a good spring clean. If I’m feeling overwhelmed by mental clutter, spending physical energy cleaning the house can make my thoughts seem cleaner too. Whenever I’ve moved house I’ve taken that time to reflect on what I really need, partly so I don’t have to lug so much stuff around. Decluttering can be a very mindful activity, and having a tidier environment often seems to reflect and/or effect a tidier mind. Owning fewer things can save money and time. For some people minimalism is linked to being less materialistic or capitalist, or more environmentally conscious. When the world feels most chaotic and out of control, being able to dress nicely, clean your living space and surround yourself with only what you need can allow us to create some order around all of that chaos.
When it comes to counselling, having a clean and decluttered work space can be beneficial for both therapist and client. It allows counsellors space to focus, and clients not to be distracted by the counsellors personal belongings. The therapeutic space is there to benefit the client and allow their story to remain the focus of our time together. Similarly the way a counsellor dresses may also be fairly simple and professional, for similar reasons.
The darkside
Almost every negative aspect of life has a light side. For example, experiencing depression can feel awful. However depression can also be seen as a coping mechanism, as a way to escape a difficult world. Equally, many positive ‘healthy’ coping mechanisms may also have a dark side. Minimalism and decluttering are no different.
I’m not a huge fan of capitalism, which I used to believe was the only reason I didn’t hold onto many material possessions. Although there was truth in that, it was not the whole truth. Not owning too many things can of course be practical, and for me a lack of income, no car and living in rented accomodation all contributed. However not spending money on oneself could also reflect how little value we place on ourselves.
I see this trend with other men (although not exclusively men) all the time. It has become a bit of a stereotype in fact. The stereotype of a single man living in a white box room, only filled with a mattress on the floor, a gaming chair and a game console. But the person who lives in that world may be someone who doesn’t value himself, who doesn’t fill his outside world with colour or joy, because his inside world is lacking these same things.
I’m incredibly thankful that my circumstances and mindset have improved. And while I still think of myself as anti-capitalist, I don’t feel the need to diminish myself. That I believe is the potential danger of minimalism. That we shrink ourselves, get rid of joy and colour, and dismiss the value of a bit of messiness. There is a certain homogeneity about minimal workspaces and home designs, which seem to value professionalism over diversity. Similarly although environmentalism may be essential to the life of our planet on a larger scale, on a personal scale it may be worth considering why we’re drawn to these things. If you’re motivated to shrink your carbon footprint, or lessen your impact on the world, do you also allow yourself to take up space?
This is unfortunately where patriarchal thinking still impacts women and trans people in particular. We see this in the so called ‘culture wars’ where the very existence of trans people offends or makes some people uncomfortable. The message being that they should shrink themselves, make themselves less visible. A message that cis women and black people will also understand all too well. There is so much value in diversity for each of us to enrich our lives. In embracing diversity and mess we can have fun, value ourselves, and draw outside the lines.
Valuing mess
The word ‘mess’ originally referred to the supply of food, or a communal eating place (e.g. ‘mess hall’). The idea of ‘mixed food’ is probably what led to it meaning ‘mixed up’ or ‘jumbled’, and hence ‘untidy’. The positive aspects of the word, those links to communal eating, community, and variety, emerge once we pick apart its meaning. Order and tidiness, while valuable as I outlined above, can also become stifling or lead to a lack of creativity.
In working as a counsellor online I can easily edit what clients see of me through their computer screens. It is easy to hide certain aspects of my room and of myself. As I said earlier, it is important to be mindful of this so that the client is the focus. However an important part of counselling can be embracing all the different parts of oneself, even the messy complicated bits. So there can also be value in counsellors modelling to clients what that looks like.
While I do aim to remain professional and focussed on each client, it’s also important to me that I’m not a blank slate. After all, the most effective aspect of counselling is the therapeutic relationship, and we cant have a real relationship if I’m a robot. So sometimes you’ll see me with unkept hair, or your might hear my cat screaming in the background (he’s not a fan of closed doors).
Feel free to contact me if you’re interested in how counselling can help you. Either through decluttering your mind, or in embracing more mess.